A Merry Kenpachi Christmas
by Sleepingstep
Summary: Ichigo has to save the day when Christmas mayhem wreaks havoc in the Eleventh Division. You can't blame Kenpachi for trying, can you? KxI MxM Yaoi Complete
1. Chapter 1

I hold no rights over the Bleach franchise nor any of the characters involved.

Note: This is set after the war and Ichigo is currently eighteen.

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**A Merry Kenpachi Christmas**

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Horror and shock jostled for dominance as Ichigo gawped, disbelieving, at the esteemed eleventh company captain, Kenpachi Zaraki.

Unsure whether to believe his eyes or to pass it off as some disturbed illusion, the strawberry managed to ask the only thing that seemed...appropriate...concerning the other man's current appearance.

"Kenpachi?"

"Yeah?"

"**Why the hell are you fucking green?!?"**

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_Fifteen Minutes Previously..._

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Ichigo was walking happily towards the eleventh company headquarters. The morning was brisk (a polite way of saying bloody cold) and the Berry's breath clouded in a fine silver mist before him.

It was Christmas Eve.

The actual reason that Ichigo was wondering the icy streets of Soul Society was that this was his last opportunity to wish a certain spiky haired captain seasons greetings before the big day. Goat Face was pretty militant about family holidays (them apparently being essential to maintaining the precious 'mystic bond' shared by relatives) and Kenpachi was the last of the captains he had yet to wish 'Merry Christmas'.

Having now arrived at the eleventh company headquarters, cheeks tinted pink from the cold, Ichigo braced himself for a moment before going inside. There was no doubt that the second he opened that door he was going to be bombarded by the bloodthirsty members of the eleventh company, so preparation was essential to avoid any possible death matches.

Now feeling sufficiently steeled, Ichigo pressed his hands against the cold hard wood of the door. Taking a deep breath, he pushed forward and stepped into..._a silent room?_

Where were the manly battle cries? Why wasn't he being pelted by an array of weapons? And why was it so God-damn quiet?!?

Checking he hadn't got the wrong place, the Berry glanced around the ominously silent room.

No, it was definitely the eleventh company head quarters, he recognised the blood stains. On second glance there was even a small group of division members he recognised by sight huddled in a corner.

Opposed to the near gurns that were the company's preferred expression, they all looked wide eyed and pale, as if they had just been forced to endure James Wan's entire Saw series. Eight times. Even more strangely none of them had tried to throttle him when he 'intruded' on their territory.

Something was obviously gravely wrong.

Hurrying over to the cluster of pale men, Ichigo tried to find someone who could tell him what on Earth was going on.

"Ikkaku?" he called, searching the alternately grizzled and battle scarred faces. "Yumichika? You there?"

The reply came in a few seconds.

"_Ichigo..?_" came a weak but instantly recognisable voice. "_Is that you?_"

Following the direction of the sound Ichigo moved to the back of the group. His eyes were greeted by the sight of a disgruntled Ikkaku with a peaky looking Yumichika's head resting in his lap.

"Ikkaku, what's happened? Is it Aizen? How many wounded?" the Strawberry blurted in a panic, instantly assuming the worst concerning the pair's appearance. "Should I get reinforcements?"

In response to his words Ikkaku merely sighed deeply, shaking his head, and Yumichika shifted slightly, murmuring something about..._pine needles?_

"No one's wounded, and it certainly isn't Aizen," Ikkaku finally responded after shushing the apparently shell-shocked and rambling Yumichika. "I doubt even _**he**_ could scheme something _**this **_messed up. As for reinforcements, they won't be necessary. Well, unless you're talking about fashion police..."

"Huh?" Nonplussed, Ichigo stared at the mismatched duo. "What's that supposed to mean? And what's wrong with Yumichika? Why's he talking about pine needl-?!?"

"DON'T SAY IT!" Ikkaku tried to stop Ichigo but it was already too late.

At the mention of 'pine' Yumichika had faded two shades paler and began to thrash in his partner's grip. "Green! GREEN!" he yelled, staring blindly ahead in apparent horror. "Oh God, THE HAIR! Bad taste! Awful fashion! Terrible! TERRIBLE!"

"What the hell is wrong with him?!?" Ichigo shouted over Yumichika's distressed cries of 'The hair! THE HAIR!' as he and Ikkaku tried to calm the beauty obsessed man.

"He's in shock," the bald man replied simply, smoothing Yumichika's ruffled locks and whispering "_You hang in there, Yumi. Ichigo will fix it, you just wait and see..._"

This apparently did the trick as at Ikkaku's soothing words the pretty man visibly calmed. Settling back down into his friends lap, there were only a few more murmurs of 'The hair!' and 'Such bad taste!' before he silenced completely.

After waiting a few seconds to check for any further outbursts, of which there were none, Ikkaku and Ichigo deemed it safe to speak.

"What the hell's spooked Yumichika so much?" He questioned incredulously, unnerved by his friend's distress. "_The hair?_ Don't tell me you've all been attacked by a rampaging toupee! And what have-," Ichigo lowered his voice to a whisper. "..._pine needles..._got to do with anything? And, most importantly,** where is Kenpachi?**"

The absence of the eleventh division's renowned captain, Zaraki Kenpachi, had only just began to play on the StrawBerry's mind. If something bad was going on, shouldn't the captain be here? Nothing _bad _could have happened, could it?

Ikkaku shook his head, frowning darkly.

"Captain's here alright," he said, looking piercingly into Ichigo's eyes. "Only he's the source of our problems..."

"What? What's wrong with Kenpachi?" Ichigo's heart pumped painfully at the idea of the captain being in possibly fatal trouble. No one could hurt _him, _right?

"Go and see for yourself. He's in there." The bald man responded with a foreboding laugh, indicating the corridor that lead towards the Captain's quarters "It's..._horrible._ Like one of those nightmares you have as a kid...but..._so...so..._"

At this point Ikkaku stopped talking and just stared into space.

Feeling it was his place to force some sense into the third seat, the Berry delivered a (non-life threatening) kick to the other man's head and shouted "Ikkaku, snap out of it!"

"Ugh, thanks," the bald man eventually said, rubbing the foot print now apparent on his shiny cranium. "Go in there and see if you can sort out this mess. Captain needs you, Ichigo,_ you're our only hope._"

The surrogate-shinigami paused to think for a moment.

"Since when do soul reapers quote Star Wars?" He finally ventured, frowning down at his friend. "Were you even, like, _alive_ when it came out?"

"Oh, shut up!" Ikkaku explosively responded, nearly catapulting the apparently unconscious Yumichika from his lap. "I do spend _some_ time in the living world! Now get going and save our division!"

"Alright! Alright! Just make sure Yumichika doesn't implode or anything..." Ichigo said, turning and beginning to walk towards the dingy corridor that lead to the captain's quarters.

"Oh, _Ichigo?_"

Now halfway towards the door, Ichigo glanced back at his friend. "What?"

"May the force be with you."

"Fuck off."

By now Ichigo had reached the imposing door leading to Kenpachi's personal quarters. Trying to shake off any apprehension as he had done before entering the Eleventh Company, the Berry braced himself and grabbed the doorknob. Taking a deep breath he turned it, and stepped forward into the personal realm of Zaraki Kenpachi.

To nearly collide with a very solid, very prickly Christmas tree.

Well, what Ichigo had _thought_ was a Christmas tree. Trees didn't usually have legs or eyes. And they _certainly_ didn't spike their hair...

_**Oh God.**_

Kenpachi had been pine-needled.

Pressing his back against the now firmly closed door, Ichigo absorbed the sight of the eleventh company captain in a giddy mix of fascination and horror.

The man's hair and entire captain's uniform had been dyed a rich conifer green, there even being a few pinned twigs for added realism. The usual bells had been replaced by a set of merry red baubles that were swaying gently, glinting in the light. In his current 'apparel', Kenpachi's tan skin gave off the perturbing, yet worryingly effective, appearance of bark...

In conclusion, the overall result was like some hapless Christmas tree that had been dragged backwards through Nightmare on Elm Street.

_**Not**_ a good look.

And so Ichigo stood there, gawping at the tree-monster Kenpachi had become, bewildered beyond comprehension.

**Why did things around here always have to be so weird..?**

Little did the hapless Berry know, they were only going to get a hell of a lot weirder.

"Kenpachi?" Ichigo finally managed, continuing to take in this new and undoubtedly terrifying sight.

"Yeah?" Seeing the captain speak was like a real life sighting of one of those 'Ent' things. Some stuff should really just stay in books...

The surrogate shinigami took a deep breath.

"**Why the hell are you fucking green?!?"**

Kenpachi looked affronted. "Why the hell are you shouting?" he growled, advancing on the hapless shinigami and yanking him from the door so that they stood in the centre of the room. "Y'know, everyone that's seen me today has only yelled at me. Even my own division. I didn't think _you_ would as well."

An odd pang of guilt tugged at Ichigo from this confession, but he swiftly quashed it. If Zaraki was going to dress like a plant mutant what kind of reaction did he expect?

"B-but Kenpachi," the Berry managed to stammer, trying to ignore the masculine and not entirely unpleasant scent emanating from the captain mere inches away. "Why are you dressed as a...a..?"

"Huh, _this?_" the captain said, raising a massive hand to indicate his clothes. "It's my costume! But so far it looks like nobody likes it..."

Ichigo stared. "_Costume..?_"

"Yeah! I've never been good with the whole 'holiday' thing and Yachiru said it would help me get into the spirit of things!"

Get into the spirit of things? Oh _God_...Ichigo had to resist the urge to slap his forehead in frustration. Trust Kenpachi to take a perfectly innocent festive idea and warp it into something only suitable for the adult end of Halloween. In a way it was kind of oddly cute, Kenpachi trying to do something non-violence related for once and hopelessly mucking up. Sweet.

One question dogged Ichigo, however.

"But Kenpachi," he said, looking the rugged man in his golden eye. "Why a _tree_?"

The captain thought for a moment, brows creasing in a frown. "_Well_, it was either elf, tree or polar bear," he finally said, warm breath feathering across the Berry's face. "I reckoned if I tried to do polar bear I'd just look like a bleached Komamura. And the day I dress up as a fucking elf is the day I die, so tree was the best option."

Ichigo could not restrain himself.

"Why didn't you just wear a Santa-Suit?!?" he snapped, completely baffled by Zaraki's less than plausible reasoning. "You didn't need to turn yourself into a frigging conifer! If you stand still for to long like _this _a bird's gonna try and nest in your hair!"

Disconcertingly ignoring the surrogate shinigami's outburst, Kenpachi merely stood and stared deeply at the Berry, as if trying to work something out. Ichigo felt oddly naked under the captain's penetrating gaze.

"A Santa-Suit..?" Kenpachi eventually ventured. "You mean like that jolly fat man's who gives out presents?"

"_Err..._"

Ichigo decided that on second thoughts, somehow the idea of Kenpachi in a Santa-Suit was even more disturbing than his amazing trans-species costume. The idea of sitting on the maniacal man's lap and stammering what he wanted for Christmas seemed more daunting than addressing Kenpachi the amazing tree-man.

_But then_...the tree man look wasn't particularly good either. In fact, it was down right awful. If Kenpachi hoped to actually leave his quarters on Christmas without being chased by an angry mob with pitchforks, it would have to go.

**The costume would have to go.**

Deciding that what he was about to do was for the good of all Soul Society (not to mention his own mental health), Ichigo steeled himself for the new task to come. There was a high probability that Kenpachi would skewer him for what he was about to do, but Ichigo was willing to risk this for the greater good. Who knows, maybe he would even survive.

**The costume **_**had**_** to go.**

"Forget about it, just..._**just..**_," the Berry repeated, trying to ignore Kenpachi's look of shock when he reached up a trembling hand to yank at the man's horribly green haori. "**Just take off your God-damn clothes!**"

It was definitely going to be a Christmas to remember.

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_To be continued.._

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**Bonus! Bleach's Latin Excerpts!**

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**Kenpachi: **Salve, Ichige! (Hello, Ichigo!)

**Ichigo: **Caput tuum in ano est. (Your head is up your ass.)

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(Yes, I am a very bored student :3 )

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A KenxIchi Christmas present for the awesome authors Saere and Bonnenuit! I can't get enough of their stuff :3!

The next chapter will definitely be up before the big day, so I hope you all are having a wonderful time!

Please review! Each one makes the next chapter more slinky!

Sleepingstep xxx


	2. Chapter 2

I hold no rights over the Bleach franchise nor any of the characters involved.

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Note: This is set after the war and Ichigo is currently eighteen.

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(Explicit content, no minors please.)

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A shout out to: BonneNuit, Raider's Pride, quietlykissingdeath, Atawalpa, RuByMoOn17 and Shinigami Nanashi! You're all the best!

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**A Merry Kenpachi Christmas. Part Two**

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Kenpachi stared down at Ichigo (who was sill determinedly attempting to remove Zaraki's haori) in complete and utter amazement. After all, it wasn't every day the Demon of the Eleventh Division, Kenpachi Zaraki, was ordered to strip.

Let alone by the delectable Kurosaki Ichigo.

By logical deduction, Kenpachi decided, this could not really be happening. This was the stuff that dreams were made of. More precisely, of Zaraki's extremely frequent and strawberry flavoured dreams.

He decided to make sure.

Reaching down a hand to still Ichigo's (which was still continuing to pull furiously as Zaraki's haori), the captain locked eyes with the red-head's. "Have I been bashed round the head a few too many times," he said. "Or is this really happening?"

"What? _You already heard me!_" Frowning up at the larger man, Ichigo flicked his hand away and finally managed to pull of the horrendous haori to let it drop in a heap on the floor. "I said take of your clothes! I am **not** going to let you spend Christmas as a tree-beast, so a little help here would be appreciated!"

Haori now off the strawberry went for those ridiculous baubles adorning the captain's hair. Thankfully they pulled out pretty easily, so Ichigo removed them, tossed them aside and returned to his task.

Kenpachi had to contain his elated surprise when the Berry's hands began to pull at his obi belt. Ichigo certainly was being thorough, wasn't he? Not that Kenpachi was complaining, if this was what he got for dressing up then he'd have to do it a hell of a lot more often.

"Let me get this straight," Kenpachi said, savouring the sight of the Berry trying to pull off his obi. "**You** want **me** out of my clothes?"

In response Ichigo shot the captain a glare with his rich chocolaty eyes. "Yes!" he snapped in exasperation. "If you hadn't quite noticed, that's what I've been tying to achieve for the last five minutes!"

Grinning madly, Kenpachi decided he couldn't argue with that. "_Right._"

Suddenly lunging for the berry, the captain yanked the red-head firm against his muscled chest and pressed their lips together in a bruising kiss. Growling, Zaraki swiftly pushed his tongue past the red-head's pliant lips and lapped up the other's taste. Loving the shocked squeak this action gained from the other shinigami, Kenpachi decided he wanted to hear more. Continuing to plunder the moist warmth of Ichigo's mouth, Kenpachi reached down to grab the berry's firm ass, kneading it in his grip and grinning madly into the kiss when Ichigo yelped at the sudden intimacy.

Eyes widening hugely as Kenpachi continued to caress and kiss him, Ichigo began to struggle under the other's intense grip. Finally managing to whip his head away from Kenpachi's sinfully demanding lips (although the hand on his ass still remained), the strawberry glared at the other shinigami.

"What the hell, Kenpa-?!?" Ichigo spluttered as a pair of strong hands began to work on his clothes, the captain swiftly yanking off his haori top and throwing it aside. It was all happening so fast. "What are you doing?!? It's **you,** not **me** who needs to strip!!!"

"Aww," the taller shinigami breathed against Ichigo's neck, causing his skin to tingle. "But it'd be no fun getting undressed by myself..." And proceeded to bite and lick at the berry's exposed flesh, making the red-head whimper and cry out against the sinful attention.

"B-but Kenpachi..," Ichigo whined, trying to ignore the hand pinching deliciously at one of his newly exposed nipples, the sensation going straight to his groin. "_We_-we can't, you're..."

Kenpachi frowned and ceased in his ministrations. "I'm what?"

"You're still a tree!" The strawberry whined, looking up at him with a pink-stained face and lips slightly swollen from their previous kiss. "We can't do anything..._like that_...if you're not the right species!"

Looking down at his still fully green and twig scattered clothing, Kenpachi couldn't help but agree. Sex was sex. And any form of clothing, tree costume or not, was a hindrance in its pursuit. But then, there was no way Kenpachi was getting undressed if Ichigo wasn't as well.

Looked like they'd just have to cooperate.

"_Fine,_" Kenpachi growled, licking at one of the red-head's sensitive ears. "But if you think I'm the only one getting naked, you've got another thing coming..."

Scooping the strawberry up bridal style, ignoring the shinigami's protests at being handled in such a manner, the captain strode across the room and dropped him unceremoniously on the couch at the back of the room. As soon as the strawberry was down Kenpachi was on him. Swiftly ripping away the remainder of the red-head's clothes Kenpachi began to bite and lick seductively at the shinigami's flushed chest, tonguing Ichigo's pert nipples.

"Nghh..," Ichigo whined as Kenpachi reached down to pump his semi-erect cock. Gasping as the captain brought him to full hardness, Ichigo had to bite down on his hand to stop himself from moaning as Zaraki began to smear the pearly drops of pre-cum over his highly sensitive head.

"K-Kenpachi!" The strawberry finally managed to choke out, trying to ignore the consuming pleasure emanating from his cock. "You-you're still fully clothed!"

"Oh, right." At the complaint Kenpachi hastily yanked off his own clothing and pressed himself back down on Ichigo. The skin on skin sensation was delicious. It was a cold day and the eleventh division's heating never worked, so the strawberry was shivering from the chill to his exposed skin. Having the red-head's soft flesh tremble directly against his own, stimulating him sinfully, was a wonderful feeling. Their members were pressing together, the delectable friction causing Zaraki to growl deeply. Kenpachi decided that the feeling could turn out to be highly addictive. Not that he was complaining.

Suddenly Kenpachi moved to kneel directly above the red-head, his large manhood directly level with Ichigo's face. Flushing two shades deeper pink, the strawberry anticipated what was going to be asked of him next.

"Suck." Kenpachi simply commanded, mind too set on the task at hand for any petty romancing. He wanted his cock in Ichigo's mouth, and any pussy-footing around the subject was only going to be a very unwelcome delay.

Zaraki was far too large for Ichigo to take completely, so the berry closed his eyes and moved forward to take the leaking head into his mouth. Frowning immediately at the bitter taste of pre-cum, he proceeded to delicately beginning to lick and suck at the invading member, slightly nervous of doing anything wrong.

Apparently he was doing a good job, however, as Ichigo almost gagged when Kenpachi growled deeply and pressed further into his mouth, Zaraki forgetting himself in the sumptuous heat between the berry's lips.

As Ichigo continued to bob and suck on the captain's cock, Kenpachi watched in appreciation. Just watching the red-head sucking him was making him even harder to the extent where it was almost painful.

It was time to move on to level two.

Reaching down, Zaraki pressed two fingers against Ichigo's lips that were still pressed tightly around his member. Ignoring the red-head's glare when he finally managed to press them into the stawberry's mouth, stretching his lips uncomfortably, the captain began to move them in and out in unison with his cock. Fuck, the wet warmth of Ichigo's mouth combined with that lithe tongue and the rough sensation of his fingers was overloading Kenpachi's member with sensation. If he wasn't careful he was going to end up coming down the berry's throat before the main event.

Deciding that his fingers were as wet as they could be, Kenpachi pulled them back from the berry's lips. Pulling back so that he was no longer mouth fucking Ichigo's delightfully tempting orifice, Zaraki swiftly flipped the smaller over and pressed a moist finger against his entrance.

"Nghh..," unable to contain a whimper when Kenpachi pushed the first finger past his tight ring of muscle, Ichigo squeezed his eyes shut and bit down on his arm to prevent any more traitorous noises. This proved impossible, however, when Zaraki began to dip the digit in and out of Ichigo, rotating it and pressing it further inside.

"What are you doing?" The strawberry growled, glaring over his shoulder at his grinning tormenter, Kenpachi Zaraki. "This is meant to be sex, not a god-damn prostate exam!"

The captain laughed rakishly. "I'm stretching you, idiot," he said, swiftly pushing another digit into the berry's warm body and relishing the snarl that this earned. "And if you're having trouble with just my fingers then God knows how you're gonna cope with my cock."

Blushing furiously at Kenpachi's crudeness Ichigo winced when the captain began to scissor his opening. The stretching sensation was uncomfortable to the max, but when Zaraki crooked his fingers and hit Ichigo's sweet spot dead on the berry could barely contain his moans.

Grinning at the red-head's obvious enjoyment, Kenpachi removed his fingers from Ichigo's winking hole. Ignoring the needy moans of protest this action gained from the red-head, Zaraki grabbed a tube of hand lotion fortunately positioned on nearby side-table and swiftly unscrewed the lid. The thought of what he was about to do next made Kenpachi's cock throb by the sheer _sexiness_ of it.

Reaching down, cylinder of hand-cream still in hand, he moved to press the head of the tube against Ichigo's entrance. And _squeezed_.

"Aghh!" Still hazy from Zaraki's previous sensual attentions the sudden shock of the cold lotion slipping into Ichigo was an unwanted surprise. "What the fuck are you doing!?!"

"Lubing you up." Kenpachi replied, matter of factly, tossing the tube aside now happy that he had poured sufficient lotion into the unwilling shinigami.

"Lubing me..?" Still uncomfortably...wet...from the cream inside him, Ichigo glared at the captain over his shoulder. "You've already stretched me to fuck! Was _th-__**that**_...really necessary?!?"

Kenpachi put his head to one side. What was with all the talk? Let's fuck already! "Well, yeah, unless you wanted it dry."

Still looking dubious, Ichigo eventually conceded. "Okay..," he finally said, eyeing the captain with rose-stained cheeks. "Err...should we..?"

Zaraki grinned. Now _that_ was an invitation! "_Right then."_ And swiftly grabbed his member to position it against Ichigo's puckered entrance, instantly shoving his entire cock into the red-head's slick opening.

"Fu-fu-FUCK!" Ichigo yowled, clawing at the couch as wave after wave of pain emanated from Zaraki's invading cock. It _hurt_, it hurt so much Ichigo could practically taste it. If the apparent 'lube' was doing anything to help it didn't bloody feel like it! "You were **meant **to go fucking slow!" Ichigo snapped, feeling pained tears well at the corners of his eyes. "Talk about taking it out on the new guy, bastard!" Burying his head in his arms, the surrogate shinigami refused to look at the infuriating cause of his agonising discomfort.

At this rate, sex was turning out to be pretty lame...

Frowning in confusion at Ichigo's admission, Kenpachi tried (and failed) to ignore the sensations emanating from his cock to analyse the berry's agonised words. "_New guy..?_" he finally said. "What, you mean you've never done this before?"

Head still buried in his arms, Ichigo snorted derisively. "Well, no!" He snarled. "No I haven't! You didn't have to frigging stick it in all at once!"

Kenpachi was amazed. "You've never..? Not even with that Abrai guy?"

"**NO!**"

As if suddenly enlightened, Zaraki smiled. "Oh," he said. "I'll be nicer to you then."

"What do you mean – _aghh!_"

Moving to sit cross legged Kenpachi had yanked Ichigo up with him so the berry was effectively sitting in the captain's lap with the man's penis still firmly inside him.

From this angle, although it would be little uncomfortable for the red-head at first (which was correct according to the berry's groans of protest), Kenpachi's reasoned that cock was much better angled to hit against Ichigo's sweet spot. The only downside was that they weren't face to face, but that only meant that next time (and there would be a next time) the captain would be sure to fuck the delectable shinigami whilst they were nose to nose.

Deciding to experiment Zaraki took a hold of Ichigo's trembling hips and carefully pulled them up, to set him back down in his lap, their skin gently slapping together. Kenpachi couldn't help but let out a deep moan as the berry slipped along his cock, and was pleased to hear a twin noise from his new lover. He grinned.

Deciding to pick up the pace, Zaraki began to slam himself in and out of his the berry. Ichigo was so hot and wet around him, gripping him fiercely as he plunged in and out of his lust filled body.

Ichigo moaned wantonly as his prostate was rammed into again and again. Kenpachi's cock was splitting him open and he was loving every moment. The feeling of Kenpachi thrusting inside of him, the captain nearly completely removing himself from the strawberry's needy body and slamming back in, was amazing. He could feel lotion, or blood, trickle down his thighs but Ichigo didn't care. His body was being overwhelmed with sensation and the overall...erotica of it caused his balls to tighten and heart to flutter wildly.

Zaraki increased his speed, thrusting up into Ichigo with the red-head pushing back against him. Delicious. Ichigo was so tight! His insides were gripping Kenpachi like a vice and the captain had never felt anything so good. It was like the berry was giving his cock a special treatment massage and it only got better and better. God, he wanted to come. But not before that delectable little surrogate shinigami had spilled himself first.

Reaching around the strawberry Kenpachi began to pump at Ichigo's weeping member and occasionally pull at his balls. To Zaraki's pleasured delight these actions caused the berry to tighten almost impossibly further around him. Shit, at this rate Ichigo was going to snap off his dick! Not that it wouldn't be a fun way to die...

Throwing back his head Ichigo let out a lusty moan. He wanted, no, needed to come. Just having Kenpachi repeatedly slam into his prostrate was bad enough, but to have him expertly jerking him off while torturing him with the ecstasy of his cock was too much!

Sensing that Ichigo was getting close Kenpachi began to wildly thrust into the berry's willing body. He wanted to feel Ichigo squeeze around him while he came, for the shinigami to milk his cock and for them both to love every second of it.

"Nghh...Ken-pachi..._I'm gonna_..."

Slamming into the red-head as hard and fast as possible, Kenpachi moaned as he felt Ichigo constrict around him in climax and soak his hand with his come. The scorching tightness around his cock becoming all too much, Zaraki growled and fiercely bit the at berry's exposed neck, shooting hot spurts of semen deep inside Ichigo's body.

They collapsed, panting and sweaty and completely naked, both too exhausted to care. Moving so that he didn't crush the red head, Kenpachi lay back and pulled Ichigo on top of him. Engulfing the smaller shinigami in a warm embrace, the captain smiled when the berry cuddled closer and rested his head on Zaraki's strong chest. A perfect moment.

"That good for you?" The captain gruffly questioned, voice still husky from sex.

"Mmm..."

Ichigo frowned when he began to feel 'essence-du-Kenpachi' trickle down his thighs, but couldn't bring himself to find a cloth and clean himself up.

"Ah! I just remembered!" Ichigo suddenly announced, sitting up and startling a sleepy Kenpachi.

Reaching over the captain, the berry searched through his clothes and eventually found a small brightly coloured bundle. He handed it to Zaraki. "This is the reason I came here. Merry Christmas!"

Although Kenpachi was a little out of touch with living world customs, he knew a Christmas present when he saw one.

"Err, thanks," he said, feeling a little awkward under Ichigo's intense stare, and proceeded to pull off the red-paper wrappings.

It was a paperweight. A little grotesque and threateningly toothy skull shaped paperweight. In the right light (and at a distance) it almost looked like a hollow mask. Why the hell had Ichigo gotten him a paperweight? Had Kenpachi actually ever done paperwork? He couldn't remember if he ever had, this mainly being due to the fact that pens (even the most sturdy) had a nasty habit of snapping when he tried to use them.

"Its smile reminded me of you," Ichigo bashfully confessed, watching Kenpachi view the weight with an oddly blank expression. Zaraki had to stop himself from snorting at the term 'smile', if the thing was doing anything with its mouth it was a death grimace. And Kenpachi apparently looked like the horrid little thing?!?

But no matter how much Kenpachi hated the nasty little ornament, there was no way he could tell Ichigo that. Not when he was staring at him with those adorably wide brown eyes. "It's..._interesting_," Kenpachi managed to choke out. "Thanks, Ichigo."

"You like it?"

"_Yeah..,_" the captain shifted uncomfortably. "I, err...actually got you something as well."

"Huh, really?" Ichigo had to contain his surprise. Kenpachi had been _thoughtful_?

"Well, I didn't really 'get' it, I more like, _made_ it," Zaraki moved to rummage around in a side-table, eventually finding something and handing it to Ichigo. "Here you go."

It was a necklace. Made out of teeth, or more likely fangs. Ichigo stared at it.

"I was going to give it to you the next time we fought," Kenpachi said proudly, grinning as Ichigo handled the object. "Took me ages to yank the teeth out! Each one is from a different hollow I killed. Thought it would suit you."

Normally, Ichigo would have been offended at having been given such a typically girly present. _This_ necklace, however, was more like a voodoo talisman than any lady's jewellery. It gave of a faint aura of impending evil...

"It's _lovely_," Ichigo swiftly lied, wondering where would be a good place to burn it. "I'll be sure to wear it...at some point."

The captain flashed a fanged smile. "Do you want to put it on now?"

Waving his arms in front of him defensively, the strawberry swiftly invented an excuse. "No-no! It would, err, clash with my shinigami uniform."

"Oh," Kenpachi said, deflating slightly. "Suppose you're right. Not that I'm to talk about fashion though. Not after that whole tree costume fiasco..."

Looking at the captain, Ichigo was distressed to see that instead of bearing his usual bloodthirsty grin, Kenpachi now looked rather glum. It didn't suit him. Ichigo liked a cheery (if murderous) Zaraki, not a sad one. He felt a sudden compulsion to be kind. Hey, he might be lying, but it was a nice lie, so it would be OK.

"You know Kenpachi," Ichigo began, resting a hand on the man's muscled arm. "The tree costume wasn't really _that_ bad..."

The captain looked up. "Y'think so?"

And as the new lovers talked away into the night, outside the Eleventh Division Headquarters snowflakes gently began to fall.

x

The End.

x

Horribly late, but explicit to make up for it! Had a few problems over the festive period so I couldn't update :D.

What do you think? Please review and tell me your thoughts!


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